A geekily-hilarious but also serious treatment of one of the least bigoted objections to the Marriage Equality decision of last Friday: the database administrators of the world now have hell to pay.


Of course, we live in the twenty-first century, and in the words of Eddie Izzard, “there’s gonna be a lot more guys with makeup during this millennium”. Basically what I’m talking about is your non-conventional people, your non-male-non-female folks. Just having sex as a “male or female” choice is as short-sighted as having “marriage” as a “husband or wife” choice. You may need something like:
- id
- forename
- surname
- birthdate
- sex_id (foreign key references column sexes)

- id
- partner_1_id (foreign key references column humans.id)
- partner_2_id (foreign key references column humans.id)
- marriage_date
- divorce_date (NULL if marriage not ended)

- id
- string
…where the latter table would contain such well-known sexes as “female”, “male”, “intersexed”, “not stated” and leave room for juggling later, since gender roles will doubtless become more non-trivial as time passes.
In fact, the whole “gender”/”sex” thing is more complicated than this. As we all (should) know, “sex” is a strictly biological term referring primarily to the shape of the organs between your legs while “gender” is more of a mental identity or social role term, so let’s include that too:

Yeah – go read the whole thing.  It’s actually all quite funny.